Style at Work

In a WSJ column on workplace dress and professionalism, we read about a double standard of sorts.

I detect a double standard, or at least a mixed agenda.

Both Jim Holt and Tom Mills got taken to the woodshed for public comments about how they view workplace attire. Yet the same women in the workplace who criticized them so viciously, are complaining that they aren't getting good feedback on what to wear to look professional.

Nobody gets good, candid feedback for long if they regularly shoot their messengers.

The reality is, the opinions of senior (often male) managers matters. You can seek to learn and understand those opinions, or you can seek to shape them. You will have a hard time pursuing both goals at once - listening and browbeating being mutually incompatible activities. And those opinions are opinions - not fact, not solid, very much a product of society and of social and cultural norms, very subject to change over time.

My advice to women is, if you want candid advice, create a safe space for that conversation to happen. Otherwise you'll silence the voices you need to hear.

At the same time, don't stop agitating outside of that safe space for equality, respect, and non-sexism at work. That struggle may be eternal - it's certainly worthy.

Of course, I'm just a guy, so what do I know?
-Tom